The moment I stepped out of the plane the brightness and shininess of the place blinded me. Mexico!

The sun reflected on every surface. The place looked like on the pages of a travel magazine: green leafy palms, endless blue ocean, and perfect white sand. People smiled at me, spoke English, and offered tourist services on every corner.

For the first year (2012), we lived in Playa del Carmen on the Caribbean shoreline, which is an hour drive from (in)famous Cancun. From day one I wanted to learn Spanish, but I barely advanced as I did not manage to immerse myself in the language. I could not get through a sentence of broken Spanish - everyone just switched to English to make my life easier. In German, we call this Verschlimmbesserung when people try to help you - but make things worse.

While I lived on the beach for almost a year, I felt very comfortable. It was a beautiful place with a perfect façade. No museums, no theaters, no cultural events - a holiday bubble created for the wealthy tourists.

We spent our days going to the best resorts of Riviera Maya such as Mayakoba and Grand Velas, to place the product that we were distributing. We would meet other people in white linen shirts and formal flip-flops, shake hands and go back to our white condo with aircon. It was our margaritas and Blockbuster period - the life before Netflix. I loved it.

Then we moved to Mexico City and did not go back to our Caribbean beach for a year and a half.

The day I returned to Playa del Carmen (2014), I realized that the place was not polished and artificial as I perceived it during my first stay. It had a soul and strong backbone in the community of families who were running and supporting it. It was full of fun everyday stories and faces.

The way we perceive a new place is a complex process. Each of us has a different lens formed through culture, values, education, and many other factors.

This time I experienced how I could see a place through two different lenses as I accumulated new knowledge and skills. There were two versions of myself: one before and one after I started speaking Spanish.

So, when I returned to Playa del Carmen, I had a cultural shock. I was now fluent in the local tongue and realized that there were two parallel worlds in this beach paradise. One for locals and one for visitors. The distinction was mainly made based on the language. If you spoke Spanish - you became a 'local'. If you did not - you were a tourist. And people who lived there but did not speak Spanish were still outsiders.

There is more to speaking a language than knowing the words and being able to express a thought. When you start speaking the language - you start understanding the culture: how people think, what they value, and why they take certain actions. People also tend to open up and share more in their native language as opposed to speaking a foreign language, which adds a layer of complexity.

That is why full immersion is essential when studying a language. When during longer periods you listen to people from the same culture speaking their native language - you unconsciously pick up clues and internalize the culture, with its values and social norms. You start mirroring the communication practices, including the tone of voice, gestures, and expressions. As you continue mastering a language, there is a magical moment when you ‘suddenly’ can start speaking with someone and instantly build a rapport, because the person is awed by your language skills.

The return to Playa del Carmen became this magical moment. Suddenly, I was able instantly to connect with people. The first taxi we got, the driver became my best friend in a matter of minutes and charged us a local rate. He wanted to know about my origins, whether I missed my family and how Mexico was treating me. He also became our driver for the next couple of days and made the trips possible to more distant locations unreachable to tourists. But it was just one of the many examples.

Every time I switched to Spanish, the person instantly got brighter and livelier. Just like when you are listening to a gray news segment on the radio and suddenly switch to a salsa song on the next station.

Tuning to the same channel creates a strong connection.

Being in Tune (Mexico Through a Language Lens)